Of Shopping and Sparkly Socks
by bonniebonbon
Summary: Harry, Ginny, Hermione and Ron go shopping. Plenty of AVPM references for Starkid fans :P


12. Socks

"Harry!" Ginny yelled.

"What?" Harry ran down the stairs afraid that he somehow managed to piss off his wife again. "What did I do? What's happening? What do you want?"

"We have to go shopping."

Harry's eyes widened. "S-shopping?"

"Yes, shopping. You've been wearing that shirt ever since First Year. Just because you don't have parents does _not _mean you have to wear the same shirt all the time. Merlin, you're _Harry Potter."_

"Shopping…shopping…"

"Yes. Shopping. Didn't you hear me?"

"I always hear shopping when you speak, but it's usually subtext."

"What?"

"Sorry, some line from a muggle show called Sherlock. Just wanted to try it out."

"I don't get it."

"Ditto."

* * *

"Girls do this for _fun?_"

"_Yes. _Honestly, it's not that bad, Harry. I don't know why you're complaining."

Harry looked aghast. "Not that bad?!"

"Blimey, Harry, we're not even in the store yet!"

"Whatever. I don't believe I'm missing a Quidditch game for this."

* * *

"Hermione! Ron! Why are you here?"

"Ginny invited us."

"No, she invite _you_. You _bloody _dragged me here."

Harry patted Ron on his back. "I feel your pain, man."

* * *

"What should we start with?" Hermione asked.

"Shirts." Ginny replied. Hermione nodded in agreement.

The couples walked across the store, the men dragging behind.

"I WANNA GO HOOOOOMEEEE."

"MEEEEE TOOO."

"MIIIIONEE-"

"GINNNNNNY-"

"CAN WE GO YET?"

"Ginny tell your man to shut up_._"

"Hermione tell my brother to quit whining_."_

"I don't feel like it."

"Well, I don't feel like it, either."

"Harry, let's ditch them. Come on, Quidditch, man…we're missing _Quidditch…_"

"Yeah…okay."

Hermione and Ginny looked at each other. Through silent conversation, they agreed on their plan of attack.

* * *

"AHH!"

"WHAT THE HELL, HERMIONE?!"

Both grown men (not to mention _famous _grown men) were dangling upside down by one of their ankles.

"LET ME DOWN!"

"I thought you _disapproved _of this spell, Hermione!"

"Eh…but then we found out who the Half Blood Prince was, and then he turned out to be good so now I'm quite fond of this spell, actually."

"Look what you did, Harry!" Ron hissed.

"What did I do?!"

"You told her about the spell."

"That was in Sixth Year, how am I supposed to know that she was going to remember it _four _years later?"

"It's _Hermione._"

"True."

* * *

With Ron and Harry still dangling in mid-air (which, naturally stared to attract some attention) Hermione and Ginny looked around at shirts.

"How about this one?" Hermione held up a purple frilly shirt with ribbons on the shoulders.

"That's nice."

"Okay, why don't you try it on over there."

"Wait-what? Me? Why would I try on something you're getting?"

"Oh! I'm not getting it, Ron, it's for _you!_"

"HELL NO."

* * *

"Harry, do you like this?"

"No."

"How about this."

"No."

"This?"

"Definitely not."

Ginny sighed. "You're too picky."

"I like _my _shirt."

"Fine, you can keep wearing your stupid shirt."

"Yay!"

* * *

"Ugh, where are they?"

"Harry! Ginny!"

"That's not going to work, Ron. Right now, we need a Hufflepuff."

"A Hufflepuff? Why? What good are they?"

"Ron, that's not very _nice. _There's this myth-well, it's _controversial_-but, _apparently, _Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders."

"I wish I was a Hufflepuff."

"Why?"

"So I could find a Hufflepuff."

"But if you're already a Hufflepuff, why would you need another Hufflepuff?"

"No need. Hufflepuff is just really fun to say."

* * *

"There you are!" Ginny exclaimed.

"Ron, Hermione, you guys done?" Harry asked, both men back on their two feet.

"Yep. Where to?"

"Pants!"

"I got you a pair of jeans, sweat pants, shorts-"

"RON, ARE THOSE SHOES ON SALE?"

"BLOODY HELL, THEY ARE!"

As the two men (wait-_men?!_) ran off towards the shoes, Hermione and Ginny sighed, watching their husbands gawk over shoes ("Ron, it's _buy one get one free!"_) in annoyance and _(slight) _amusement.

* * *

"It's been half an hour. You better of gotten a nice pair of shoes."

"Shoes? Nah. We got socks."

"Socks?!"  
"Yeah! There were red ones-"

"-orange ones-"

"-and yellow, don't forget the yellow ones-"

"-green, blue, purple-"

"-pink, turquoise, magenta, they had all sorts of colours-"

"-_rainbow_ ones-"

"-and there were ones with _penguins_ on them_-_"

"-oh yeah, I really liked those-"

"-AND SPARKLY ONES!"

"THOSE WERE BRILLIANT."

"I KNOW, RIGHT?! We need to get them. Hermione, can we get them?"

"No."

"PLEASEEEEE. I'll be good."

"Nope."

"I'll be as happy as a squirrel!"

"Let me think…_no._"

"I'll take you up to Winnepeg!"

"Winnie-what?"

"Winnepeg. It's in Canada."

"Okay then."

"I can get the socks?!"

"What? No. But I'd like to go to Winnepeg, it sounds interesting."

"Hmph."

"…"

"Speaking of _sparkly," _Harry said after a few awkward seconds of silence, "There's this hilarious muggle series I read during my summer of fifth year. So there's this vampire, and he _sparkles _in the _sunlight.._."

"What? Seriously?"

"It gets better. You see, this sparkly vampire is _actually _a 107 year old bloke who watches this girl sleep…"

Their voices faded as they walked away from their irritated wives, now walking towards the _socks _section to see what the fuss was all about.

**A/N: Whoa. This was so random. Review if you had the misfortune of reading this :P Don't review if all you're going to say is that "this was so OOC." Because I'm well aware of that. Hoped you liked all the random AVPM references in this :P **

**POTTER ON,**

**Bonniebonbon**


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